In email 2
I suggested that wanting a better life means that we must become
absolutely positively obsessed (A.P.O) with the creation of something
better. Anything less then this and we are apt to stay stuck in the same
paths of least resistance (cow paths).
- Becoming A.P.O. is not about forcing the subconscious mind to accept new ways of being.
- Becoming A.P.O. is not about demanding quick or unrealistic changes.
Rather, it is about understanding that the subconscious mind usually
learns best when we feed it incrementally. Becoming A.P.O. is about
recognizing that the journey or process of change is just as important
as the desired outcome.
The goal must be to support the subconscious mind to willingly absorb
new ways of being. If we wish to create new cow paths we cannot
forcefully drag the subconscious mind into new territory without the
expectation of resistance. Rather, we must patiently influence it to
accept new ways of being in an incremental manner.
- All lasting growth is cumulative.
- True positive growth is maintained with grace and ease.
- Creating something better means that we must prepare ourselves to
settle in and take a long range, realistic view of the change process.
- Deliberately and consciously feeding the subconscious mind
palatable and plausible bits of information over time will respect the
learning needs of the mind.
Too often changes that are made quickly through the force of sheer willpower rarely last.
It takes very little for us to “fall off the wagon” and revert to past
programming. Relapsing to old ways of being (thoughts, feelings, and
behaviors) is simply an indication that the subconscious mind has not
yet fully absorbed updated messaging.
Along the way we have failed to recognize and respect the subconscious
minds need for incremental learning. You can liken this to expecting a
small child, who is just learning the alphabet, to be able to read and
comprehend the intricacies of a well researched journal article. We
logically know that this would be a huge and unrealistic leap. In our
displeasure with the GAP we place unrealistic expectations on ourselves.
Yet, as adults, we often expect ourselves to journey from point
A to point B without investing the time needed to develop the necessary
tools and strategies.
As human beings, we naturally resist change. Creating long term,
lasting, positive change often means that we must become suspicious
about our desire for quick fixes. Becoming A.P.O. means settling in,
being curious, asking questions, experimenting, and finding a way to
gracefully accept that if we are to influence the subconscious mind, we
must be willing to do so on it’s terms.
Terri Lee Cooper MSc. RSW