It is not unusual for the anxious individual to become fixated on internal and external negative judgments. People who feel anxious often feel internal and external judgment deeply, and indulge in self talk that increases the level of anxiety. People who experience anxious states frequently use words and phrases like: "stressed, overwhelmed and worried."
Common thoughts are “I can't breathe, I can't think straight, my mind is either in a fog or it is racing." Going through life feeling on edge, apprehensive and uneasy can play havoc with mental and physical states. People who describe themselves as panicky and fretful seem to be more susceptible to feeling run down and are more likely to attract colds, flu and experience headaches and stomach aches.
There is also a feeling of shame.
Freedom from anxiety offers a sense of control and a new perspective on life. Many people find social situations to be challenging. In fact, the majority of people have some level of unease in some social situations. Like all things, it is a matter of degree isn’t it? Whether it is meeting new people, beginning a conversation, being asked to explain an idea in front of a group, being put on the spot, or simply finding words to express the thoughts running through the head, most people are not as comfortable as they would like to be.
Our comfort with social situations can increase. Our lack of comfort is most often a learned response that has become a second nature or “talent.” It becomes easy to move into the position of fear/anxiety/self-doubt around other people, often simply because this stance has been so well programmed at the subconscious level.
- People who have developed the ability to connect with others are at an advantage in terms of forging new personal and business relationships.
- These individuals are more likely to describe their social lives as satisfying.
- This does not mean their social circle is necessarily large, but the individuals within it have qualified to be there.
- The ability to begin small, with “small” talk is a talent that can be developed and subconsciously accepted.
The ability to "get a read" on others is a natural skill that is muffled by anxious signals. The ability to create realistic goals for different social situation comes with an understanding of how we operate and how others function as well. An understanding of useful solution focused hypnosis and NLP principles can put the “socially anxious" person in a commanding powerful position. A mindset that allows for a natural unfolding of rapport with others can be built and strengthened.